If I had to sum up the past few weeks at work, there would only be a few words that would come to mind: a lot of fun, a lot of sitting around. It's a strange combination of expressions, but so far, pretty accurate. (Note the time of this post is 8:36 am...)
Sure, I have been through a great deal of training that has shared a lot of information that is actually useful to my position. And as it turns out, there is a lot to know before I go out on the road. Today and tomorrow I will be in an especially weird spot. It's too early to call schools, as most either have just started classes, or will not start classes until next week. But, in all honesty, that's about all I have to do for now. Once I begin calling schools, life will get crazy, and I'll be lucky if my phone will ever stop ringing, but for now....silence.
Now, about being the big kid... I still have to say that my transition from student to professional is not near complete, but each day brings me a little closer. Last night, I went with the rest of the women of the office to Provost, Carol Sue's house for a women's social with desserts, junk food, and like 50 bottles of wine. The whole point: to mingle with other women of the university...my accomplishment for the night: mingling with the other admission advisors and just saying hello to all my old professors. But I have to say that I did feel like a big kid...and that's a good feeling.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Thursday, August 24, 2006
New Job!
Yesterday I began a very new adventure in the story of my life. I started my new job at UWP Prospective Student Services. You are now reading the blog of an Associate Admission Advisor and Territorial Manager...(longest title ever?) I wasn't sure how the adventure would begin, but it quickly turned into a typical university day.
I began by sitting at my desk for a half an hour staring at a black computer screen. Everyone was busy starting their own day, so I just patiently waited for someone to tell me what I should do. But I did take the initiative to turn on my computer and attempt to log in. And I failed. Someone had locked my computer with an administrator password, so I couldn't log in...thus the black screen. Then I sat in a group meeting with our office and met everyone officially. And the group is a very enjoyable one that I think I will hang out with a lot.
After the meeting going over what we would need to train on, I then sat around for a while until the Student Affairs Division meeting. This meeting was one that I had heard of as an RA. It was one of those meetings that the Resident Directors always were forced to dress up a little more and attend. So, naturally, when I saw all the Housing Staff at the meeting, I suddenly felt like I was breaking some rule by being there. It was just a strange way to transition from student to professional.
After the awkward meeting and lunch, I decided to accomplish something, so I went around to what seemed like 50 some offices around campus to get paperwork taken care of. This took quite the effort and the run around all over campus. But I got my new ID, driving authorization, and credit card papers all almost taken care of. I hope to finish that stuff by the end of tomorrow.
While I was taking care of that stuff, I got side tracked by Stacie, the Marketing Manager, in our office, to help with the whole tv spot. I showed them the cool park and bridge behind campus, and I got some disk golfers to be in a shot, too. I felt powerful. :)
Today was super boring having to go through campus new staff orientation. I kind of wanted to poke my eyes out several times. Most of the information was for teaching staff and faculty...not non-teaching staff like myself. But lunch was a crazy experience. The chancellor decided to plop down at my table and chat for the lunch hour. I told him that I used to be a student there (bad chancellor for forgetting me), and that I lived across the street from him. It was cool.
So that was the first two days. Both had their ups and downs, but I think I'm really going to like this job, and if I do say so myself, I think I'll be pretty good at it. :)
So, how was your day?
I began by sitting at my desk for a half an hour staring at a black computer screen. Everyone was busy starting their own day, so I just patiently waited for someone to tell me what I should do. But I did take the initiative to turn on my computer and attempt to log in. And I failed. Someone had locked my computer with an administrator password, so I couldn't log in...thus the black screen. Then I sat in a group meeting with our office and met everyone officially. And the group is a very enjoyable one that I think I will hang out with a lot.
After the meeting going over what we would need to train on, I then sat around for a while until the Student Affairs Division meeting. This meeting was one that I had heard of as an RA. It was one of those meetings that the Resident Directors always were forced to dress up a little more and attend. So, naturally, when I saw all the Housing Staff at the meeting, I suddenly felt like I was breaking some rule by being there. It was just a strange way to transition from student to professional.
After the awkward meeting and lunch, I decided to accomplish something, so I went around to what seemed like 50 some offices around campus to get paperwork taken care of. This took quite the effort and the run around all over campus. But I got my new ID, driving authorization, and credit card papers all almost taken care of. I hope to finish that stuff by the end of tomorrow.
While I was taking care of that stuff, I got side tracked by Stacie, the Marketing Manager, in our office, to help with the whole tv spot. I showed them the cool park and bridge behind campus, and I got some disk golfers to be in a shot, too. I felt powerful. :)
Today was super boring having to go through campus new staff orientation. I kind of wanted to poke my eyes out several times. Most of the information was for teaching staff and faculty...not non-teaching staff like myself. But lunch was a crazy experience. The chancellor decided to plop down at my table and chat for the lunch hour. I told him that I used to be a student there (bad chancellor for forgetting me), and that I lived across the street from him. It was cool.
So that was the first two days. Both had their ups and downs, but I think I'm really going to like this job, and if I do say so myself, I think I'll be pretty good at it. :)
So, how was your day?
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
A Quick Update
Ok, so it's been a while since my last post. A lot has happened in a few short days.
As you know, I went to Illinois for a few days a week ago, and it was so fun. But that has already been discussed. Following that trip, I went to visit my parents for a few days. My mom and I went on a shopping spree, and this also has been discussed. Continuing the marathon of travels, I went to see Brandon at his place in Jordan, Minnesota. What a weekend. It was a lot of fun.
We went to the Mall of America and shopped til we dropped (literally). I found a pair of shoes that I had been searching for for weeks, and of course, I bought them on the spot. I think there's something to impulse buying. I get a lot of fun stuff on impulse. :) We also went to the zoo. The last time I had been to a zoo, I was probably eight, so that was cool. I liked the fish and sharks and stuff the best. Brandon also gave me the grand tour of his area, and Jordan is a super nice community. I liked it a lot.
Somewhere along the marathon route, I managed to squeeze in a hair cut and a dentist appointment. Good news - no cavities for the 22nd year in a row! :) It has been a great week or two, but it sure did add a lot of milage to my car and my life.
Tomorrow I start my new job training (at 7:45 am) and I am so excited! I think it's going to be fantastic. And Friday my parents and Brandon will be in town which means dining out and hanging out. Saturday, Brandon and I are going to my friend Bridget's cookout for the day, and Sunday is church.
So, as usual, life does not slow down for this crazy kid. It just keeps plowing forward at breakneck speed, but you know I wouldn't have it any other way. Wish me luck on my job, and good luck to everyone starting classes this week and next!
As you know, I went to Illinois for a few days a week ago, and it was so fun. But that has already been discussed. Following that trip, I went to visit my parents for a few days. My mom and I went on a shopping spree, and this also has been discussed. Continuing the marathon of travels, I went to see Brandon at his place in Jordan, Minnesota. What a weekend. It was a lot of fun.
We went to the Mall of America and shopped til we dropped (literally). I found a pair of shoes that I had been searching for for weeks, and of course, I bought them on the spot. I think there's something to impulse buying. I get a lot of fun stuff on impulse. :) We also went to the zoo. The last time I had been to a zoo, I was probably eight, so that was cool. I liked the fish and sharks and stuff the best. Brandon also gave me the grand tour of his area, and Jordan is a super nice community. I liked it a lot.
Somewhere along the marathon route, I managed to squeeze in a hair cut and a dentist appointment. Good news - no cavities for the 22nd year in a row! :) It has been a great week or two, but it sure did add a lot of milage to my car and my life.
Tomorrow I start my new job training (at 7:45 am) and I am so excited! I think it's going to be fantastic. And Friday my parents and Brandon will be in town which means dining out and hanging out. Saturday, Brandon and I are going to my friend Bridget's cookout for the day, and Sunday is church.
So, as usual, life does not slow down for this crazy kid. It just keeps plowing forward at breakneck speed, but you know I wouldn't have it any other way. Wish me luck on my job, and good luck to everyone starting classes this week and next!
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Shopping Spree!
Oh wow. Today was a blast. I got to hang out with my best friend (a.k.a. Mom) and go shopping all day long. We were gone from 10:30 in the morning until almost 6:00 at night looking for everything under the sun that would work for office attire. And boy did we hit the jackpot! Well, almost.
We went everywhere within reasonable driving distance, and that included two separate malls, a few shoe stores outside the mall, and a Wal-Mart. I got tons of layery shirts (my favorite wardrobe essential), a few pairs of pants, and some new Victoria's Secret grear. Then I came home and finished up my day with some online shopping (as if real-life shopping had not been exhausting enough). I ordered some pants from my favorite store (the Gap) and some shoes from my Steve Madden.
Overall it was an exciting day. I feel mostly geared up for a new job with a real office (ok, desk space, but it's a start!) and real tasks to do. I'm ready to hit the road, stylishly, and bring some cool kids to the UWP. Yay for me and my mom! :)
I hope your day was as cool as mine was, but I bet it wasn't!
We went everywhere within reasonable driving distance, and that included two separate malls, a few shoe stores outside the mall, and a Wal-Mart. I got tons of layery shirts (my favorite wardrobe essential), a few pairs of pants, and some new Victoria's Secret grear. Then I came home and finished up my day with some online shopping (as if real-life shopping had not been exhausting enough). I ordered some pants from my favorite store (the Gap) and some shoes from my Steve Madden.
Overall it was an exciting day. I feel mostly geared up for a new job with a real office (ok, desk space, but it's a start!) and real tasks to do. I'm ready to hit the road, stylishly, and bring some cool kids to the UWP. Yay for me and my mom! :)
I hope your day was as cool as mine was, but I bet it wasn't!
Monday, August 14, 2006
We Won!
I would just like to post an announcement that the Community Evangelical Free Church's women's volleyball team won their first match of the season tonight! (Ok, so we played a team that only had four players...So what!) We won! Yay for us! I was excited. :) That is all. Have a good night.
Sunday, August 13, 2006
On Our Way (Part II)
And now the trip is almost over. We've given our hugs, said our goodbyes, kissed the baby, and it's almost time for sleep. How would I rate this experience? Overall, I would say it was very positive. I mean, let's face it, I do love babies. But this trip has given my a lot to think about.
The thought weighing on my mind right now is the undeniable urge to be a mother. Now, I fully understand that there are most likely many life events that I must yet go through before motherhood takes place, but I can still not ignore the fact that I love babies like I love my own kidneys. (Not sure why this was the first thing that came to my mind that I loved, but just go with it.) I love holding them, smelling them, comforting them, everything about them. And although I am sure that I do not know it all, I feel that I would still be a good mother. And I want it now. It's strange to have this so strong at this point in my life when so much else is going on. There's a new job on the horizon (beginning in the next few weeks), a new boyfriend to try to figure out (and figure out how to let him figure me out), and a fairly new life developing myself as an adult.
There are many other thoughts swamping my mind tonight as well, many of which will remain in my mind and prayers and not on this page. There are just a lot of "what if''s", "what now's", and "what when's" to think about. Knowing that there is really nothing that I can adequately control in life (at least not well), I have to daily (or more realistically, hourly) give all these worries and swamping thoughts up to the One who has the plan. I mean, what else can I do? Is dwelling on or fretting over all my tomorrows going to make them any better? Any more like I want them? I surely doubt it.
So, for tonight, I place my head on this hotel pillow, and talk to God (since we all know there hasn't been a lot of sleeping taking place for me lately) I will be asking a lot of questions, all of the thoughts stuck in my head. But more importantly, I will be listening, listening to what God has probably been trying to tell me all along about life and plan and purpose, timing and love and matters of the heart. And maybe that's what's been missing lately in my life anyway, my ability to even try to listen to God. Even when I feel that I have surrendered all my worries (and even when I have surrendered it all) I still often fail to really stop and listen. "Sure God, here's my life. I'm giving it to You, but don't expect me to put in any real effort. That may just be too tough." Well, it's time to straighten up, listen up, and maybe God will wise me up. That's the hope for tonight anyway.
The thought weighing on my mind right now is the undeniable urge to be a mother. Now, I fully understand that there are most likely many life events that I must yet go through before motherhood takes place, but I can still not ignore the fact that I love babies like I love my own kidneys. (Not sure why this was the first thing that came to my mind that I loved, but just go with it.) I love holding them, smelling them, comforting them, everything about them. And although I am sure that I do not know it all, I feel that I would still be a good mother. And I want it now. It's strange to have this so strong at this point in my life when so much else is going on. There's a new job on the horizon (beginning in the next few weeks), a new boyfriend to try to figure out (and figure out how to let him figure me out), and a fairly new life developing myself as an adult.
There are many other thoughts swamping my mind tonight as well, many of which will remain in my mind and prayers and not on this page. There are just a lot of "what if''s", "what now's", and "what when's" to think about. Knowing that there is really nothing that I can adequately control in life (at least not well), I have to daily (or more realistically, hourly) give all these worries and swamping thoughts up to the One who has the plan. I mean, what else can I do? Is dwelling on or fretting over all my tomorrows going to make them any better? Any more like I want them? I surely doubt it.
So, for tonight, I place my head on this hotel pillow, and talk to God (since we all know there hasn't been a lot of sleeping taking place for me lately) I will be asking a lot of questions, all of the thoughts stuck in my head. But more importantly, I will be listening, listening to what God has probably been trying to tell me all along about life and plan and purpose, timing and love and matters of the heart. And maybe that's what's been missing lately in my life anyway, my ability to even try to listen to God. Even when I feel that I have surrendered all my worries (and even when I have surrendered it all) I still often fail to really stop and listen. "Sure God, here's my life. I'm giving it to You, but don't expect me to put in any real effort. That may just be too tough." Well, it's time to straighten up, listen up, and maybe God will wise me up. That's the hope for tonight anyway.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
On Our Way
Well, here I am, sitting in a hotel room with Brandon and his family...one hotel room...all of us. Now, I don't find this completely strange, but if the roles were reversed and this was my family and Brandon sitting in the room...well I just can't even visualize it. Is that strange?
But we're here in Decatur, Illinois (or somewhere close at least), and I can't wait to see that new beautiful baby and hold her. I love babies. There's something about little babies that just warms my heart and soul. It makes me want to be mom every time.
Tonight was great though. Lots of good time in the hot tub and the pool. Lots of good times in the vehicle, too. I expect the rest of the trip to be very good. I love this family.
Anyway, this entry, I must admit, is one of my most dull, but perhaps there will be a part two that will be much more interesting...like how my day went with the cute baby. :)
But we're here in Decatur, Illinois (or somewhere close at least), and I can't wait to see that new beautiful baby and hold her. I love babies. There's something about little babies that just warms my heart and soul. It makes me want to be mom every time.
Tonight was great though. Lots of good time in the hot tub and the pool. Lots of good times in the vehicle, too. I expect the rest of the trip to be very good. I love this family.
Anyway, this entry, I must admit, is one of my most dull, but perhaps there will be a part two that will be much more interesting...like how my day went with the cute baby. :)
Thursday, August 10, 2006
Wind Through My...Helmet
Today was the first day that I got to test ride my brand new bike. And I must say, it felt pretty darn good. Ok, so I can't lie. Most of it felt good. The climbing of the massive hill located on County B on your way to the M...no so good. In fact, it was down right painful. But hey, beauty has a price...ok, so I'm not even in it for any sort of beautification. I just want to be in shape, you know, feel good. But the road to being in shape is paved with lactic acid (which for those of you who failed biology, that's what makes your over-used muscles feel sore). But enough about the pavement. Let's set some goals!
I feel the desire to participate in Platteville's next summer Parks and Rec Triathlon. Weird, since I have not always been known as the physically ambitious type and especially not the running type. But I've got the drive, so goals are next.
During the winter, due to the Midwest's tendancy to be snowed upon, I figure there will not be much biking done. But I will get a PAC membership and go to the pool several times a week and lift in the weight room several times a week. While I'm on the road with my job, I will hopefully have hotels with pools in which I will swim. Once spring comes, it's all about the bike and the run and the outdoor swim.
Now, don't get me wrong, this does sound like a lot of work, but I have already decided that I am not doing this to say I am the best or the fastest or the coolest person you've ever seen. I want to do it for FUN. That's right all you crazy people out there. Working out can be fun. Being in shape, also fun. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.
Anybody want to join me?
On a completely related note - I will be doing some triathlon traveling the next few days. Let me elaborate. I will be leaving on a family fun trip to Illinois to see a beautiful baby, followed closely (and I do mean like 20 hours later) by a trip to visit my parents, followed immediately by a trip to see my boyfriend in his natural habitat. Talk about your triathlon! But it should be super fun, and then it's reality check time as I start my real-life job two days after my return. Woo! Life is sure crazy. Don't blink, you might miss it!
Lyrics to ponder tonight...Jennifer Knapp "In the Name"
All these years, too many ahead to think clear
Some say where's my crystal ball.
Some men play the lottery,
Makin' bets against the governments economy.
They say I'd rather be rich than be alive at all.
When men in miry circumstances fall,
It won't be hard to tell where they placed their resolve.
Some trust in chariots,
But we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
To each his own won't lead you home and prob'ly never will.
I won't trust in the things I do.
Cuz they will not stand and they won't come through.
So I'll trust in the name of the Lord my God...
Oh, I'll trust in the name.
Picket fences may build our defense
In domestic wars of leisure suits.
That's ok, it doesn't bother me.
You can hold onto your philosophy of
What's mine is mine, what's yours is yours,
But whats the truth?
When the walls do crumble and they fall,
It won't be hard to tell where we place our resolve.
Some trust in chariots,
But we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
To each his own won't lead you home and prob'ly never will.
I won't trust in the things I do.
Cuz they will not stand and they won't come through.
So I'll trust in the name of the Lord my God...
Oh, I'll trust in the name.
I feel the desire to participate in Platteville's next summer Parks and Rec Triathlon. Weird, since I have not always been known as the physically ambitious type and especially not the running type. But I've got the drive, so goals are next.
During the winter, due to the Midwest's tendancy to be snowed upon, I figure there will not be much biking done. But I will get a PAC membership and go to the pool several times a week and lift in the weight room several times a week. While I'm on the road with my job, I will hopefully have hotels with pools in which I will swim. Once spring comes, it's all about the bike and the run and the outdoor swim.
Now, don't get me wrong, this does sound like a lot of work, but I have already decided that I am not doing this to say I am the best or the fastest or the coolest person you've ever seen. I want to do it for FUN. That's right all you crazy people out there. Working out can be fun. Being in shape, also fun. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.
Anybody want to join me?
On a completely related note - I will be doing some triathlon traveling the next few days. Let me elaborate. I will be leaving on a family fun trip to Illinois to see a beautiful baby, followed closely (and I do mean like 20 hours later) by a trip to visit my parents, followed immediately by a trip to see my boyfriend in his natural habitat. Talk about your triathlon! But it should be super fun, and then it's reality check time as I start my real-life job two days after my return. Woo! Life is sure crazy. Don't blink, you might miss it!
Lyrics to ponder tonight...Jennifer Knapp "In the Name"
All these years, too many ahead to think clear
Some say where's my crystal ball.
Some men play the lottery,
Makin' bets against the governments economy.
They say I'd rather be rich than be alive at all.
When men in miry circumstances fall,
It won't be hard to tell where they placed their resolve.
Some trust in chariots,
But we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
To each his own won't lead you home and prob'ly never will.
I won't trust in the things I do.
Cuz they will not stand and they won't come through.
So I'll trust in the name of the Lord my God...
Oh, I'll trust in the name.
Picket fences may build our defense
In domestic wars of leisure suits.
That's ok, it doesn't bother me.
You can hold onto your philosophy of
What's mine is mine, what's yours is yours,
But whats the truth?
When the walls do crumble and they fall,
It won't be hard to tell where we place our resolve.
Some trust in chariots,
But we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
To each his own won't lead you home and prob'ly never will.
I won't trust in the things I do.
Cuz they will not stand and they won't come through.
So I'll trust in the name of the Lord my God...
Oh, I'll trust in the name.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Someone Who Gets Me
After a phenomenal chat on the phone with my certain someone, I have come to the conclusion that it is really nice to have someone who gets me, really gets me. Every word that we said seemed to hold a shared sentiment by the other. It was comforting.
You know what else is comforting? Having Someone that gets you all the time, no matter what mood or events surround me. I could be in the deepest depths or on top of the highest mountain, and there is Someone who is standing by my side. God never is baffled by my actions or worried about my reactions. After all, He wrote the book of my life before I ever existed, did He not?
God, thank You so much for always getting me, for understanding my ups and downs, my strange behaviors, and my ever-changing attitudes. Thank You for never bailing on me, even if I may bail on You every now and then. I am not perfect, far from it in fact, but You are. So I don't have to doubt Your power or Your love. It'll always be there. You will always be there. Please don't ever let that thought leave my mind. Maybe then I would be more faithful, more grateful, more trusting of You. You are my God and my Creator. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You. I love You more than words can express.
You know what else is comforting? Having Someone that gets you all the time, no matter what mood or events surround me. I could be in the deepest depths or on top of the highest mountain, and there is Someone who is standing by my side. God never is baffled by my actions or worried about my reactions. After all, He wrote the book of my life before I ever existed, did He not?
God, thank You so much for always getting me, for understanding my ups and downs, my strange behaviors, and my ever-changing attitudes. Thank You for never bailing on me, even if I may bail on You every now and then. I am not perfect, far from it in fact, but You are. So I don't have to doubt Your power or Your love. It'll always be there. You will always be there. Please don't ever let that thought leave my mind. Maybe then I would be more faithful, more grateful, more trusting of You. You are my God and my Creator. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You. I love You more than words can express.
Ahh, Normal
I just wanted to make a quick note that today I feel increadibly normal. And I can't tell you how wonderful that is. My spirits are high, life is good, and I'm ready for the day ahead. The past few days have really done a number on me, but it has been for the best. My heart has been searching, and again I've found what I'm looking for.
Here's Proverbs 3:5-7 as found in The Message translation:
Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he's the one who will keep you on track.
Don't assume that you know it all.
Run to God! Run from evil!
Here's Proverbs 3:5-7 as found in The Message translation:
Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he's the one who will keep you on track.
Don't assume that you know it all.
Run to God! Run from evil!
What a Walk
Yesterday after work, I had the sudden urge to go for a run. Now, if you know me at all, you're thinking, "Well, that's weird," because Lindsey does not run. But it was undeniable, so I suited up, found my tennies, loaded up my mp3 player, and headed out. But I decided that walking was a much better idea.
It was a beautiful night. The sun was peeking in and out of the clouds, the breeze was nice and cool. I walked through campus first as it was my comfort zone for so long. I walked through Memorial Park behind campus, then found the Roundtree Branch Trail. I had heard a rumor that this trail went something like all the way to Mineral Point. And although I had no intention of walking to Mineral Point last night, I did feel like it would be an adventure to see where it led me.
So, I walked and walked and walked. And twice I found myself without a trail, totally at a loss for when I had actually gotten off the trail. And then I was in the Domino's employee parking lot...and the trail stopped cold. First of all, I already felt like an idiot for walking through the giant parking lot past all the employees on their smoke breaks. But to walk past them again when I finally realize the trail was gone was almost too much for me to bear. So I finished my walk in a state of fury.
So, if anyone has an official map of the trail that goes to Mineral Point, or even if you know where I can go to start the trail (um, that doesn't require me to risk my life by walking on any roads), please let me know. I'd love to explore it.
It was a beautiful night. The sun was peeking in and out of the clouds, the breeze was nice and cool. I walked through campus first as it was my comfort zone for so long. I walked through Memorial Park behind campus, then found the Roundtree Branch Trail. I had heard a rumor that this trail went something like all the way to Mineral Point. And although I had no intention of walking to Mineral Point last night, I did feel like it would be an adventure to see where it led me.
So, I walked and walked and walked. And twice I found myself without a trail, totally at a loss for when I had actually gotten off the trail. And then I was in the Domino's employee parking lot...and the trail stopped cold. First of all, I already felt like an idiot for walking through the giant parking lot past all the employees on their smoke breaks. But to walk past them again when I finally realize the trail was gone was almost too much for me to bear. So I finished my walk in a state of fury.
So, if anyone has an official map of the trail that goes to Mineral Point, or even if you know where I can go to start the trail (um, that doesn't require me to risk my life by walking on any roads), please let me know. I'd love to explore it.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Nothing Like a 2x4 to the Face
It's Sunday afternoon, and I have just recently been smacked in the face with a 2x4...again. This happens every now and then when I lose sight of what's really important in life or get overwhelmed with the details of it all. This weekend, I spent some time with my good friend Bri, and we had some really good heart-to-heart talks recently. Last night's topic of interest was the complexity of life and our ablility to worry about it every waking second of the day (and for me, all of the want-to-be-sleeping moments of the night).
It was wonderful just to have someone to share my thoughts, worries, and feelings with. But that wasn't really the moment of 2x4 impact. That took place this morning as the sermon centered around life's path. Pastor went on about how we get so caught up in making sure that we are on the right path and knowing what the path is that we completely forget to include God in it all. And what a realization that was. And it's so frustrating! I have had this moment over and over throughout life - hundreds of times. This I-can't-believe-I-forgot-God moment that makes me think I have everything under control. Why in the world does it keep coming back to this? I mean, I know that God is better off in control and that I should trust Him for every moment and move that I make. I know it. I believe it!
But here I sit again today, in my kitchen, feeling nothing but misery for falling again. Will I ever learn? Will I ever truly realize the power and care of the God that created me? At this point in my life, it seems unlikely, but oh how I long for the moment when it doesn't just click for one decision or one life-crisis, but the moment when I can live it...forever.
In my frustrations I go back to a Jennifer Knapp song. This song reminds me that I will never be perfect, never have the ability to ever be 100% faithful to anything, but there's a God out there who is faithful, who will never leave us or lead us astray. A God who is Faithful to Me:
All the chisels I've dulled carving idols of stone
that have crumbled like sand 'neath the waves
I've recklessly built all my dreams in the sand,
just to watch them all wash away
Through another day, another trial
Another chance to reconcile
To One who sees past all I've seen,
and reaching out my weary hand,
I pray that you'd understand,
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
All the pennies I've wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly,
for a faith to be faithful to me.
Through another day, another trial,
Another chance to reconcile
To One who sees past all I've seen,
and reaching out my weary hand,
I pray that you'd understand,
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
It was wonderful just to have someone to share my thoughts, worries, and feelings with. But that wasn't really the moment of 2x4 impact. That took place this morning as the sermon centered around life's path. Pastor went on about how we get so caught up in making sure that we are on the right path and knowing what the path is that we completely forget to include God in it all. And what a realization that was. And it's so frustrating! I have had this moment over and over throughout life - hundreds of times. This I-can't-believe-I-forgot-God moment that makes me think I have everything under control. Why in the world does it keep coming back to this? I mean, I know that God is better off in control and that I should trust Him for every moment and move that I make. I know it. I believe it!
But here I sit again today, in my kitchen, feeling nothing but misery for falling again. Will I ever learn? Will I ever truly realize the power and care of the God that created me? At this point in my life, it seems unlikely, but oh how I long for the moment when it doesn't just click for one decision or one life-crisis, but the moment when I can live it...forever.
In my frustrations I go back to a Jennifer Knapp song. This song reminds me that I will never be perfect, never have the ability to ever be 100% faithful to anything, but there's a God out there who is faithful, who will never leave us or lead us astray. A God who is Faithful to Me:
All the chisels I've dulled carving idols of stone
that have crumbled like sand 'neath the waves
I've recklessly built all my dreams in the sand,
just to watch them all wash away
Through another day, another trial
Another chance to reconcile
To One who sees past all I've seen,
and reaching out my weary hand,
I pray that you'd understand,
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
All the pennies I've wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly,
for a faith to be faithful to me.
Through another day, another trial,
Another chance to reconcile
To One who sees past all I've seen,
and reaching out my weary hand,
I pray that you'd understand,
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Not a Mom
So, today I babysat for three kids (4, 2, and 6ish months). And I quickly decided one thing - I am not a mom...not yet anyway. It's not like it was even hard to babysit all of them because it wasn't, but I think you have to build up to a comfort level with three kids. You know, like have one, get used to her, have another get used to the two of them, have another... It was a rather uneventful day with the three of them, and I definitely can't wait to be a mom (but triplets are out of the question).
In other news...I am in dire need of a run to the post office. And for the record, I think that the US Postal Service would make a lot more money if they were a 24 hour a day service. I'd love to go to the post office now (8:20 pm on a Saturday), but clearly, they are closed.
And in entertainment...I am now going to spend some much needed R&R time with my good friend Brini. And Brandon got lost in an art festival in Minneapolis today...after showing up an hour an a half early for a party...Well, at least it was entertaining to me. :)
In other news...I am in dire need of a run to the post office. And for the record, I think that the US Postal Service would make a lot more money if they were a 24 hour a day service. I'd love to go to the post office now (8:20 pm on a Saturday), but clearly, they are closed.
And in entertainment...I am now going to spend some much needed R&R time with my good friend Brini. And Brandon got lost in an art festival in Minneapolis today...after showing up an hour an a half early for a party...Well, at least it was entertaining to me. :)
Friday, August 04, 2006
Up and Down Day
Today was a great day...most of it.
I woke up late, even later than usual. It was like 9:15. I thought I set my alarm for 8:00, but it turns out, not so much. But it's ok. I feel rested, and that gave me a happy start to my day.
I began by cleaning up some junk around my place, and that only led to my OCD raging out of control. First I organized the bathroom cabinet...to the best of my ability. Then I moved on to the upstairs. This was, for reasons I can't explain and don't understand, completely out of control. There was clothes everywhere, the bed was unmade, the closet and dresser were overflowing with unfolded and sometimes inside-out clothes. I looked at the whole sight with disbelief. How could this have happened? Me...Miss OCD herself let things get out of control. So, after I got over the initial shock and bewilderment, I got straight to work. All the drawers were emptied into coordinated piles, separated by type of clothing, of course. Then they were all neatly folded, and put back into the drawers. Oh, and I pulled out about a garbage bag full of stuff that would obviously not fit me or I would never wear again to give away to GoodWill. Then I moved on to the closet and repeated the whole process until all the clothing was neatly stored away where it belonged.
Several hours later I came back downstairs and looked for another project. The kitchen definitely had potential to be another OCD project, and as it turned out, it sure was. So I started on one wall and emptied the cupboards, cleaned them out, and put stuff that made more sense inside. The most gratifying project of all in the kitchen was the tupperware cupboard. Man, there's a lot of junk in there. After sorting them all into piles according to size, shape, and style, I put them back, and, of course, I lined them up with their coordinating lids to make it the most convenient for future storage opportunities.
After that, I looked around to find yet another project, but I had none. But I did have an unignorable urge to buy organizational tools. So, I made a list, and flew to Wal-Mart (where, coincidentally I ran into Gail again...that would be two days in a row that we were both at Wal-Mart at the same time). I managed to spend way too much money, but I did buy some cool things that made me very happy. I bought eight, no, nine baskets, a new kitchen clock (which I think is very classy), and three square cork boards with black frames. Oh, I also got three kitchen canisters for sugar and such.
I got home and immediately implemented all of my new tools, and it was very satisfying. But then...the phone rang. Bri was calling, and I was very excited. We were going to hang out tonight and do girl things like binge on ice cream and watch teary romantic movies (or something), but her night became full...good grief for the parents wanting to go out to eat with their daughter anyway. And my high from the day of fulfilling my compulsions was suddenly gone. The idea of spending my Friday night alone was very sad. It made me wish for my family, my boyfriend, some friends...
But then Bri promised to spend tomorrow night with me. So, I guess all's well that ends well. So, for tonight, I'll hang out and watch some lame TV until I fall asleep. Sweet. (Oh, and I'll definitely call my boyfriend, who will undoubtedly cheer me up.)
Well, I'm sure no one actually spent the time to read all the way through this ridiculous memory walk through my day, but at least I feel better having shared my thoughts with...my keyboard...
I woke up late, even later than usual. It was like 9:15. I thought I set my alarm for 8:00, but it turns out, not so much. But it's ok. I feel rested, and that gave me a happy start to my day.
I began by cleaning up some junk around my place, and that only led to my OCD raging out of control. First I organized the bathroom cabinet...to the best of my ability. Then I moved on to the upstairs. This was, for reasons I can't explain and don't understand, completely out of control. There was clothes everywhere, the bed was unmade, the closet and dresser were overflowing with unfolded and sometimes inside-out clothes. I looked at the whole sight with disbelief. How could this have happened? Me...Miss OCD herself let things get out of control. So, after I got over the initial shock and bewilderment, I got straight to work. All the drawers were emptied into coordinated piles, separated by type of clothing, of course. Then they were all neatly folded, and put back into the drawers. Oh, and I pulled out about a garbage bag full of stuff that would obviously not fit me or I would never wear again to give away to GoodWill. Then I moved on to the closet and repeated the whole process until all the clothing was neatly stored away where it belonged.
Several hours later I came back downstairs and looked for another project. The kitchen definitely had potential to be another OCD project, and as it turned out, it sure was. So I started on one wall and emptied the cupboards, cleaned them out, and put stuff that made more sense inside. The most gratifying project of all in the kitchen was the tupperware cupboard. Man, there's a lot of junk in there. After sorting them all into piles according to size, shape, and style, I put them back, and, of course, I lined them up with their coordinating lids to make it the most convenient for future storage opportunities.
After that, I looked around to find yet another project, but I had none. But I did have an unignorable urge to buy organizational tools. So, I made a list, and flew to Wal-Mart (where, coincidentally I ran into Gail again...that would be two days in a row that we were both at Wal-Mart at the same time). I managed to spend way too much money, but I did buy some cool things that made me very happy. I bought eight, no, nine baskets, a new kitchen clock (which I think is very classy), and three square cork boards with black frames. Oh, I also got three kitchen canisters for sugar and such.
I got home and immediately implemented all of my new tools, and it was very satisfying. But then...the phone rang. Bri was calling, and I was very excited. We were going to hang out tonight and do girl things like binge on ice cream and watch teary romantic movies (or something), but her night became full...good grief for the parents wanting to go out to eat with their daughter anyway. And my high from the day of fulfilling my compulsions was suddenly gone. The idea of spending my Friday night alone was very sad. It made me wish for my family, my boyfriend, some friends...
But then Bri promised to spend tomorrow night with me. So, I guess all's well that ends well. So, for tonight, I'll hang out and watch some lame TV until I fall asleep. Sweet. (Oh, and I'll definitely call my boyfriend, who will undoubtedly cheer me up.)
Well, I'm sure no one actually spent the time to read all the way through this ridiculous memory walk through my day, but at least I feel better having shared my thoughts with...my keyboard...
Thursday, August 03, 2006
A Thief I Am
Today was quite the exciting day. Not only did I get to nanny for a very fussy teething 14 month old, but I took a new road home, and broke into my boyfriend's parents' house. Yep, it was an exciting day.
Ok, so I can't deceive you for too long. Obviously, someone like me could not just break into a home without permission and just mess the place up. Actually, I ran into Brandon's parents and Wal-Mart today as they were buying pink paint, and I asked them for a copy of a photo. Gail told me just to stop by after work even though no one would be there. So I did. But I did take a photo that I didn't have permission to take...but I left a note and promised to bring it back. So, I feel that justifies it.
In comtemplating the rest of my life, I have come to the conclusion that time moves way too fast. And with each year, more forward motion takes place. You cover more ground in less time as you race to some unknown finish line somewhere. I mean think about it. In the past five years you've accomplished some high school and college. And sure, now you may have a job and such, but think about what the next five years holds in store. Wedding? Babies? A house? Who knows...maybe none of it. But all that stuff sure seems way more substantial than an education. What's life going to be like when we're forty or fifity? Will we even be able to hold on? That was just the thought plaguing my mind today.
Oh, and as a bonus to this post...a photo. Aren't we cute?
Ok, so I can't deceive you for too long. Obviously, someone like me could not just break into a home without permission and just mess the place up. Actually, I ran into Brandon's parents and Wal-Mart today as they were buying pink paint, and I asked them for a copy of a photo. Gail told me just to stop by after work even though no one would be there. So I did. But I did take a photo that I didn't have permission to take...but I left a note and promised to bring it back. So, I feel that justifies it.
In comtemplating the rest of my life, I have come to the conclusion that time moves way too fast. And with each year, more forward motion takes place. You cover more ground in less time as you race to some unknown finish line somewhere. I mean think about it. In the past five years you've accomplished some high school and college. And sure, now you may have a job and such, but think about what the next five years holds in store. Wedding? Babies? A house? Who knows...maybe none of it. But all that stuff sure seems way more substantial than an education. What's life going to be like when we're forty or fifity? Will we even be able to hold on? That was just the thought plaguing my mind today.
Oh, and as a bonus to this post...a photo. Aren't we cute?
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Fun with Bri and good stuff in life.
Tonight was a lot of fun. I went out for ice cream with my good friend Bri Otte. I love Bri. And for those of you keeping track, yes, she would be my boyfriend's sister. We have not had nearly enough time together lately, but tonight we brought back a tradition from last semester at the Culvers. We talked about lots of things that were very good to talk about. Things like boyfriends, family stuff, and the future that we really don't get a chance to talk to anyone else about. It was good for the soul...for both of our souls.
More good news - today I got all my thank yous done from my mission trips. Now all I need to do is the envelopes and actually send them....so I figure I'm actually about half done with them. :) But hey.
I had a great weekend with my family this past weekend. My mom and I shopped like crazy fools for fun stuff like jewelrey and purses, went out to lunch, and even treated ourselves to some Tropical Sno (that would be some super fance snow cones, for those of you not familiar with the craze of the TS). It was a lot of fun. And I gave a short and sweet presentation at my church about my trips. The old people loved it, and let's face it, that's why I really had to do it...for the old people...mission accomplished.
And that's it. That's all I've got.
More good news - today I got all my thank yous done from my mission trips. Now all I need to do is the envelopes and actually send them....so I figure I'm actually about half done with them. :) But hey.
I had a great weekend with my family this past weekend. My mom and I shopped like crazy fools for fun stuff like jewelrey and purses, went out to lunch, and even treated ourselves to some Tropical Sno (that would be some super fance snow cones, for those of you not familiar with the craze of the TS). It was a lot of fun. And I gave a short and sweet presentation at my church about my trips. The old people loved it, and let's face it, that's why I really had to do it...for the old people...mission accomplished.
And that's it. That's all I've got.
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